Random Ramblings

Name:
Location: Ona, West Virginia, United States

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

I have a Job!

I’m a working man!  Since I posted last, I’ve been hired, quit, and then hired by someone else.  Going to work is a real frustration with me.  I’ve enjoyed the past 6 months having Linda working and me staying home and wished it could have continued.  It is not that I have not been working; in fact I feel that I have worked very hard around here. But, for the most part, I’ve loved it.  Being able to help the kids and grand kids is a real pleasure.  I love having the grand kids with me when I work.  Yesterday Kellen was a great helper while I was working on the water lines.  (We are finally connected to public water but we have leaks,)  Lydia was also my side kicks while we were working.  Nolan tried to help and walked through a blast of cold water gushing from the water pipe and showed his Miller/Hershberger temper.  I could not have done the accomplished the work yesterday without Kellen.  He seemed to be real proud of being the man.  

More about my working life!  About a year ago I registered with the state for civil service jobs.  Actually, I was ranked number one the list for a position I tested for but was never called for an interview.  About a month ago, while working underneath the double wide,  I got called from Lincoln county Department of Human Services about a position as a family support specialist .  I had looked into this position once before and felt it would be a position that I would greatly enjoy.  It is basically a case management position trying to move families from dependency to independence (or partial).  After being interviewed I was quite certain that I would be offered the job.  It does the ego some good knowing that someone still wants you.

I started thinking of all the reasons why I should not take this job.  It would be a 45 minute drive from the house (of course it takes 20 minutes to get off the ridge, so there is no job closer than 30 minutes).  This job is a Monday through Friday 8-5 job (never worked one in my life).  I would not have the flexibility to help Eric with his many needs for help.  Steph can’t go pick up Eric’s kids; she doesn’t have enough room in her car and dealing with 6 kids ranging from newborn to 10 would be a bit challenging.  The pay scale for this job would start at minimum (over $16,000 below the maximum) in spite of my experience in the field. Since I’ve not been working my cholesterol level has dropped to the lowest point since we started checking it (maybe we can stop the build up in the arteries).  Being at home, when the pressure mounts I can back off.  I had it all figured out, when they call me to offer the job I would just say no.

After playing phone tag for a while ( I wasn’t trying to be very available), Human Services finally reached me.  What a glutton for ego massaging I am.  I really enjoyed the nice things she told me; how impressed they were at the interview; how I could try it and if I decided it wasn’t for me they would understand; how I could “move up the ladder”; how I could bid for a position closer to home if one opens up.  How could I say “no”?  What a sucker I am; I said yes!  How stupid!  There is no way I can do this job and help the kids and grand kids the way I want to.  I’ve spent too many years putting work before family (and always justified it).  After agonizing for about a week, I finally called and told them I would be unable to take the job.  That was hard!  I hated it!  It would have been so much easier to say no in the first place!  Will I ever learn?

I do have another job now!  I’ll cover that in my next post!  How long will that be?  God knows!